Stand down, SunWoman.

7.15.18

Anger came shaking out of my body this week. I stood before her, a younger cousin, gesticulating with my hands and arms, and I became more frustrated and misunderstood. After, I spent much of the day replaying the argument in my head. I know I became upset as she persisted in over-talking. I would begin to say something or explain why such and such was the case, and as I talked she would butt in with plenty words of her own. Her interruptions especially bothered me. I told myself a couple of times to just exit the conversation, return later when we both were calmer. I, too, persisted, going toe for toe with someone who regularly argues like this. I wanted to prevail, to say, I had the last word when, for my sake and for hers, I could have used a moment alone to gather my thoughts. I do not know much about ego and Jungian philosophy but here, in these moments when I felt more strongly about the truth in my opinion and less about the end result, how we both would feel, I know that I was feeding the aspect of myself that delights in looming large over someone or something else. 

Stand down, SunWoman. That's all I have to say, stand down, sometimes.